Wednesday, September 20, 2006

If you can't fight them, join them: Hacking the vote for the Dems....

Recently, a couple of nerds from the "Freedom to Tinker" blog went off to Princeton University and demonstrated how to hack into Diebold voting machines -- by using the key to a mini-bar. Do you KNOW what this means? Elections are about to take on a whole new twist! Democracy is about to get a LOT more interesting.

I can see it now:

"This is Brit Hume, reporting for Fox News on the winners of the November 2006 Congressional elections. Just before the polls closed tonight, it seemed as if Democratic candidates all over the nation were taking the lead -- but then suddenly the Republicans came up from behind, energized their base, got out the vote and, in precinct after precinct across the land, performed the impossible and overtook the Democrats' strong lead." Obviously the Diebold fix had been pulled off yet again.

But wait! Suddenly the Dems once again pulled ahead! Have they too been using their mini-bar keys? It looks like the answer is yes!

"This is Bill O'Reilly. What a race! With the numbers pouring in from precincts all over the nation and people voting in record numbers FIVE MINUTES before the polls closed, the Republicans have once again surged ahead!"

But then, just as suddenly, the Dems now had SIXTY-FIVE PERCENT of the vote! What is going on here?

"This is Allan Colmes. The final election results are now in. The Republicans have won the House AND the Senate by an amazing ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY PERCENT margin of votes."

So. Will the Democrats be able to top even that? Do the Dems still have their keys to the mini-bar? America, this is the most exciting race in election history! It's anybody's guess as to who will be leading our nation! Please stay tuned....